


dearly beloved

by arafinwean



Category: The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, Heart-to-Heart, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-01
Updated: 2018-02-01
Packaged: 2019-03-12 05:16:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13540461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arafinwean/pseuds/arafinwean
Summary: The loss of a mother can be hard, Glorfindel does his best to help Elladan cope.





	dearly beloved

**Author's Note:**

  * For [elladansgirl](https://archiveofourown.org/users/elladansgirl/gifts).



The years since Celebrían had left been hard on Imladris. There was a darkness that seemed to linger over it’s ruling family, a sadness and rage that despite Elrond’s best efforts nothing could diffuse.

 

The twins seemed to be hit the hardest by their mother's loss, for while Arwen grieved, she did not actively seek out orcs to slay. She already had her vengeance, she had told Glorfindel once when her brothers and her had rescued their mother and ensured that none who touched her remained. That was her vengeance. Arwen had taken solace in the fact that her mother still lived, that even if Celebrían could not remain with them at least her mother was alive.

 

The twins were different.

 

They rarely spent time in the valley anymore, preferring to spend their time out in the Trollshaws hunting orcs and anything else they came across. Elladan and Elrohir became like ghosts, like shades seeking revenge for their family. They only came back to Imladris when their wounds became too grievous or when they needed more supplies. When they did come back they shunned any and all conversation, only seeking those who could repair their gear or offer them supplies. Everyone else became a distraction, something that only got in the way of their quest.

 

Despite the combined efforts of Glorfindel, Erestor, and Elrond, neither twin seemed content to stay in the hall of Imladris. While in the settlement the twins stalked the halls, restless and wary, and something in Elrond’s heart broke knowing that his halls no longer provided warmth and comfort to his sons.

 

“I remain unsure of what to do,” Elrond confessed to Glorfindel one evening while they met in Elrond’s study, “I understand the twins grief and rage. Yet each time I attempt to reach out to them they seem to get further and further from my reach-” worried silver eyes locked with Glorfindel’s gold ones- “I worry what will become of them at this rate.”

 

Glorfindel’s lips thinned in a tight frown. He too worried about what would become of the twins should they continue down the path they were on. Glorfindel had seen many warriors lost to the helpless rage they felt after they had learned of the death of a loved one. He had seen how seeing someone you love tortured and nearly dead left its scars on all involved. He had himself had felt a helpless rage when he had seen Ecthelion fall to Gothmog. When had seen the Balrog stalking the group he had lead from the city Glorfindel had been filled with such an unrelenting rage that even as the Balrog tried to flee he had chased after it. 

 

His rage had made him reckless, had lead to his death. As such Glorfindel knew all too well how dangerous rage could be. He understood why Elrond was concerned just as he understood the overwhelming feeling of rage that the twins felt.

 

“I’ll speak with them,” Glorfindel promised and it seemed as though some weight was lifted from Elrond’s shoulders.

 

“Thank you, friend,” Elrond said, a hopeful smile on his face, “I hope it will do them some good.”

 

As do I, Glorfindel thought to himself.

 

* * *

 

His conversation with Elrohir had not been easy. Nor had it been successful, the younger warrior had stormed off as soon as things had gotten too heated, anger falling off of him in such a way that Glorfindel thought it was prudent to let Elrohir calm down before speaking to him again.

 

Which meant that now he had to speak to Elladan. A stone fell to his stomach at the thought of speaking to Elladan. Glorfindel was not a man who often denied his feelings yet when it came to the young elf-lord Glorfindel had spent an absurd amount of time denying he felt anything for Elladan. He had told himself that he couldn’t feel anything for Elladan. It had been in vain, for, in the end, his affections for Elladan had only grown stronger with time until he could no longer deny his love for Elrond’s son.

 

With a heavy heart, Glorfindel made his way to the stables, a kindly scholar had mentioned seeing Elladan head that way and Glorfindel could only hope that Elladan hadn’t left. It was one thing to be reckless while you had someone you trusted guarding your back, it was another thing entirely to be reckless without someone there with you.

 

With the way Elladan was at the moment, Glorfindel couldn’t help but wonder if he would search out orcs on his own.

 

If he tried, Glorfindel wouldn’t let him.

 

When he reached the stables, Glorfindel found Elladan brushing his horse. Elladan looked peaceful for the first time since he and his siblings had found their mother and Glorfindel felt a pang of guilt for interrupting.

 

Eru knew that Elladan deserved all the peace he could get.

 

Before Glorfindel could decide whether or not to interrupt Elladan’s peace the younger elf turned and cast a judgemental gaze toward Glorfindel.

 

“If you’re here to lecture me I must tell you to save your breath. I have every intention of leaving tomorrow.”

 

Glorfindel sighed, weary, and cast his gaze upward. What was he supposed to tell Elladan? The tactic he had tried on Elrohir would no doubt not work on Elladan either. He was at a loss. He had no idea what he should say to Elladan or how to approach this in a way that wouldn’t make Elladan hate him.

 

“Walk with me?” Glorfindel suggested, and felt no small amount of relief when Elladan nodded.

 

* * *

 

Eventually, the two of them wound up in front of a still, clear, lake. The air around them was still, heavy with words they couldn’t bring themselves to say and the implications of what could transpire between them should one of them make the wrong move.

 

Glorfindel closed his eyes, his mind flashing back to the rage he had felt at seeing his city fall. He wondered what would have become of him had he survived. Would he had been able to set aside his rage without the healing the Halls had offered him? Would he have been able to move on, to forge a new life the way his kin had?

 

He does not think so. Even now there is a burning in him that rose with every battle. Even now thoughts cross his mind of riding out one day and never returning, of hunting all things dark and vile until there is either nothing left for him to hunt or until he lay dead in a pool of his own blood.

 

Glorfindel knew rage like the back of his hand. He knew of the days where he felt little other than a fire that burned in the back of his mind. On those days he threw himself into training, into ensuring that those under his command were taught to the best of his abilities. Glorfindel had learned how to challenge that rage, that fire, into a sort of fierce protectiveness for what he considered his.

 

Elladan was one of those he had sworn to protect despite the fact that Elladan could protect himself. Glorfindel would not see either twin fall into the darkness of their own mind.

 

“I know rage well,” Glorfindel admitted, his voice softer despite the strength of his words, “I felt nothing but rage as I led my people away from our burning city. I felt nothing but a ferocious fire and the need for vengeance as I chased the Balrog down.”

 

Glorfindel felt Elladan’s eyes on him, could feel the sharp gaze of the younger elf as he watched Glorfindel.

 

“They never mentioned you gave chase,” Elladan said, his voice quiet. Glorfindel had never talked much of Gondolin, much less it’s fall. All Elladan had to go on were books of lore and stories passed down through his family.

 

Glorfindel laughed harshly. “No,” he said, “I don’t suppose they would have. It’s much easier to paint someone as a hero if they hadn’t given chase to a fleeing enemy,” Glorfindel turned to look at Elladan, his eyes serious, “My rage lead to my death. I have seen others rage lead them to the same fate just as I have seen it lead them worse ones.”

 

“I am not you.” There was defiance in Elladan’s tone.

 

Glorfindel raised an eyebrow. “I know, however that does not mean that you are incapable of making the same mistakes I and so many others have made.”

 

A thoughtful look crossed Elladan’s face. “You worry about me.” Something in Elladan’s tone held awe and Glorfindel wondered what he had done to place it there.

 

“I worry for the both of you,” Glorfindel confirmed, “I would not see you harmed because of this rage. Neither would anyone else. We all worry for you Elladan, just as we worry for your brother as well.”

 

“You shouldn’t.”

 

“Yet we do. You are precious to all of us. Watching you the past few years has been difficult. Would it be so hard to speak with us? To spend more time here with your family?”

 

Elladan let out a frustrated noise. “There are still orcs out there. My brother and I will not stop until-”

 

“-Until what?” Glorfindel asked, his voice hard, “Until one of you die? Or will it be until the both of you are dead? Elrond has lost much in his life. Do not make him lose his sons as well.”

 

“We would never leave him,” Elladan hissed, his eyes gleaming like silver gems in the setting sun, “We know what we are doing!”

 

“Then you should also know that at the pace you are going you will burn yourself out,” Glorfindel replied, “That the pace you are pushing yourselves at will be your undoing.”

 

“We cannot sit idle as orcs continue to take others as they took her!” Elladan exclaimed, “I cannot sit and do nothing when there are others out there who could be suffering the same fate as my mother. I can’t-” His voice broke off, a sound of anguish escaping him as he buried his face in his hands.

 

Glorfindel felt his heart ache for the elf in front of him and before he could second-guess himself had Glorfindel had Elladan in his arms.

 

“You cannot save everyone,” Glorfindel said, his voice softer than it had been before, “No matter what you do, there will always be those who are too far away for you to save.”

 

"I should be able to do more," came the muffled reply, and Glorfindel knew that feeling all too well. Had felt that he hadn't done enough as Gondolin burned behind him, that someone else should have been chosen to return to Middle-earth when Glorfindel himself had felt that he hadn't done as much as he should.

"I know how you feel," Glorfindel said, stroking Elladan's mane of raven black hair, "But there will always be those you cannot save. None of us are able to save everyone. It would be foolish to think that we can."

 

"Perhaps I am a fool then."

 

"Not foolish," Glorfindel corrected, "Compassionate. You see the evil in this world and wish to make it disappear. You wish to aid all those you can despite the fact you know in your heart that that is impossible. You have a kind soul Elladan." _And I love you for it._

 

Glorfindel did not confess even as the words were on the tip of his tongue, even as Elladan drew away from him and gave Glorfindel a tight smile.

 

"I should speak with Elrohir," Elladan said, "We have much to discuss."

 

Glorfindel nodded and let Elladan leave.

* * *

It has been a year since Glorfindel had spoken with Elladan that night, a year since the twins had decided to cut back on their trips. The two of them still go orc hunting, but now they bring others with them and always come and stay in Imladris for the same amount of time they've been gone.

At the moment, Glorfindel is speaking with Elladan in the library. Their voices and laughter soft as to not disturb the other elves there.

 

"I am glad to see you and Elrohir spend more time with us," Glorfindel confessed, "It is good to see the two of you at home more often."

 

Elladan smiled, bright and happy and Glorfindel felt his breath catch.

 

"I'm glad you think so," Elladan said, "It was good of you to remind us of the fact we have a home."

 

"I would have done anything to remind you of the fact."

 

A sly and hopeful look entered Elladan's eyes. "Is that so?" Elladan asked, leaning toward Glorfindel, "Anything?"

 

Glorfindel felt a smirk grow on his face even as his eyes were drawn to Elladan's lips. "Anything."

 

Their first kiss was chaste, a quick peck to see if the other would return their advances. When it became clear that neither party was going to back away Elladan pulled away long enough to whisper something Glorfindel would have a hard time remember later because the moment after Elladan attacked Glorfindel's lips with the fervor of a dying man.

 

Glorfindel groaned, low in his throat and brought his hands up to tangle in Elladan's hair.

 

"You're beautiful," Glorfindel whispered after they parted, taking in Elladan's kiss-swollen mouth and dark eyes, "Gorgeous." 

 

Elladan laughed a quiet, breathless thing. "Just as you are," he teased, reaching up to tug a lock of Glorfindel's golden hair, "Stay with me tonight."

 

Glorfindel felt himself smile. "Of course," he said, pressing another chaste kiss to Elladan's mouth and pulling away before the other could turn it into something more, "I'll stay as long as you want me."

**Author's Note:**

> this was my first time writing third age characters believe it or not. still, the challenge was fun and I hope whoever requested this enjoyed it! <3


End file.
